Author: C. Kays
Editors: S. Woien, J. Hollendonner
3 minute read…
“You could leave life right now. Let that determine what you do and say and think.” – Marcus Aurelius
Americans have a tough time thinking about death. It is something people dread and avoid at all costs, but it is one of the most natural things that happen in a person’s life. Memento Mori is a Latin term that means “remember you will die.” Some may find that depressing and unmotivating, but once we come to terms with this truth, the doors of life open for us and we can go from existing, to truly living.
Stop and Smell the Roses
Once we come to terms with our mortality, we start to truly appreciate life and notice the beauty in the little moments. When we slow down and become present, we learn to appreciate what it means to be human. Noticing the pure joy in a stranger’s laugh or seeing the smile of a child who is experiencing something new for the first time become reminders that our time on the mortal plane is precious. Each interaction and experience should be cherished.
Being present in life also leads to more careful conversations and intentional thoughts. If we are aware that we can die at any moment, we start to make our words count. I remember one of the last conversations I had with my Oma. I would usually say goodbye to her by simply saying, “Bye Oma! Thanks for the food,” but this time I hugged her a little tighter and said, “Bye Oma. It was so good to see you again. I love you.” I heard a soft “Oh!” and I pulled away, curious as to why she was so surprised. “I love you too..,” she said with tears in her eyes. It was at that moment where my heart broke a little. In my 27 years of living, I had never had a moment of true sincerity with her. Growing up we never really shared our feelings and I regret that we didn’t have that moment sooner, but I am happy knowing we got to have it before she died.
Live in the Moment
“It is not death that a man should fear, but rather he should fear never beginning to live.” – Marcus Aurelius
When we understand the fragility of life, we start to live more consciously. We notice how our jobs are affecting our life or how we feel being around our current social circle. By being in the present, we start to truly live for our best self. If we look around and find that something doesn’t bring us joy or is hindering us from achieving our personal goals, we will have the confidence to make a change. Living in the moment lets us take control of our lives to make sure our future is what we want to happen, not letting it just unfold however it may.
Some of us may find this process of changing our lives intimidating or scary. Fear of the unknown is completely valid. However, we cannot let this stop us from making those changes. There is a leap of faith that we must take at some point, but before we jump into the abyss of the unknown, we can set ourselves up so that we will land as closely to the destination we want.
Sowing the Seeds
After decades of living, one of the more disappointing things is knowing that we have regrets. Regretting the things we did not do is not how we want to spend our twilight years. While being present in our lives, we need to also consider the long term as well. What are our dreams and goals? How do we get there? And this should not be a stressful endeavor. Start small. Maybe we want to become better at cooking so we can feed our children healthier meals. We can start making time to take a class or find some videos online to teach us. By focusing on what we can do to make our lives better we become closer to our best selves. We are a work in progress, but in order to get better we must do better.
Death comes for us all. He might come tomorrow, in ten years, or maybe fifty. We cannot know when he will pay us a visit. Until then we must live for the now. Live for the little moments in life that remind us of being human. The laughs, tears, and anger are all a part of being human and connect us all. We must live our best lives now so that when death finally does come, we can greet him and share all of our triumphs and memories.
Challenge: Take a moment to reflect on your mortality. I know it might be scary to think about, but just remember that it is natural and your feelings are appropriate. Now acknowledge those feelings, and write down three things you want to improve in your life. They can be as small or big as you want. Think about what would truly make you happier. Once you have them written down, write a small plan on how you will begin to work towards those goals.
Photo Credits: (From top to bottom) “Crumbling Memento Mori 04” by byronv2, “Lucky Marcus Aurelius” by Marc Barrot
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